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Peter Swire posted a condolence
Sunday, August 18, 2019
Ross Freed was my best friend when I was a little boy. He passed away on this summer, at the age of 61. Here is a short, imperfectly expressed, essay about the life he lived with his family, especially through my eyes as a kid.
Ross faced great medical challenges from the time of his first brain tumor, at the age of 6. From then on, he had a shunt inside his body that moved excess fluids from inside his brain down to his chest area. Sometimes it didn’t work, and he needed to go to the hospital. That was scary when we were little. After many surgeries, another brain tumor ultimately caused his death. I was so sad to hear this news, as were many others.
The obituary, here, captures his spirit:
https://levinememorialchapel.com/tribute/details/3791/Ross-Freed/obituary.html#tribute-start.
It says: “He faced his illnesses and resulting medical complications with dignity and humor. The way he lived has been a lesson in humility, grace and acceptance to all who knew him.” At some level Ross must have known that his medical problems had robbed him of capabilities that he would otherwise have had. But I never heard him complain of that. Instead, he faced them with that grace and acceptance, and I’m grateful for his example.
Ross found the things that he could do with joy, and he did them. Ross learned to play improvisation jazz piano. I loved it when he sometimes got a little smile when playing – each of us feels good when the music sounds beautiful, even if other things in life are hard.
Ross grew up skiing, and became a ski instructor for the disabled. I remember him telling me about teaching a blind student to ski and how happy the student was upon completing a run. I believe Ross had special empathy and patience with those students, and enjoyed the opportunity to help others.
When we were little, Ross and I were in Sunday School together and later Hebrew School, getting ready for Bar Mitzvah. We spent many hours in the car together to and from our temple, which was all the way across town. As neighbors, we had snowball fights in Albany’s long winters, and in the summer we often built forts and played in the woods near where we lived. In the Freed house there was always a card table downstairs with a big jigsaw puzzle. We’d spend hours working on the puzzles and playing board games, chatting along the way, maybe playing ping pong for a break. Ross taught me to play gin rummy. Their basement playroom was a second home for me––only a few minutes’ walk away from my house.
To this day, I know the Freed house by heart, as I learned again when Annie and I visited last summer. You know that feeling of complete familiarity, even though you haven’t been in a place for many years? From all of the games of hide and seek, I knew the closets and all the small places around each corner. When I was little, I was treated as part of the family: I could walk right into the house, with no need to knock or ring the bell, and I could go straight to the refrigerator. My sincerest thanks to the Freed family for their generosity and for creating such a haven for me as a little boy.
Last summer, Annie and I visited Ross and his mother in that same house. His family remained close with Ross, supporting him all through the years. That afternoon in their house was an affirmation of a lifetime of warmth and friendship, and gave me a deep appreciation for how his family has always been at his side.
In Spanish, people say “Mi casa es tu casa.” That was how the Freeds treated me in their home. It was how Ross treated those who knew him in life. Thank you to Ross and the entire family for sharing your lives and your home with this little boy, and for the example you set for us. May we all be as gracious and generous in our own lives. Rest in Peace, my lifetime friend, Ross.
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Scoops, Colonie, 2018
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Skiing at Panorama, BC 2011
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Making cider in Richmond, MA, Columbus Day weekend, 2018
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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With Marc climbing Kilimanjaro 1976
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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At Citi Field for Mom's birthday with Barbara (Mom), David, Reuben, Marc, Jamie and Aileen (taking photo)
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Enjoying ice cream at Scoops in Colonie, 2018
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Marc, Ross and Bert Freed in Nairobi, Kenya, 1976
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Marc Freed uploaded photo(s)
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
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Skiing with Andy Swartz at Panorama resort, British Columbia, 2011
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Jeff Applebaum posted a condolence
Thursday, July 11, 2019
I am so saddened by the loss of my dear friend Ross. We had many memorable and fun times together whether it was skiing at Stowe in Vermont or out in Colorado at Vail, playing golf, swimming or biking. Ross was such a good, caring, loving person to me, my daughter and family. He will be sorely missed.
RIP my friend
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Tom Coppa posted a condolence
Thursday, July 11, 2019
My condolences to the family. I only met Ross a couple of times through my brother Frank, who was a good friend of Ross, but I heard many stories of their adventures over the years.
Rest in peace.
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Bill Bronstein posted a condolence
Wednesday, July 10, 2019
Dear Cousins:
Please accept our condolences. Having the ability to get together with Ross in all our family functions throughout the years, it was always a pleasure to share time with Ross. I will always have fond memories of our time together enjoying his great laugh,
wit and listening to him on the piano.
Despite his health challenges over the years, he only shared his positive outlook on life whenever we got together. I will always treasure our time together.
Bill Bronstein
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Don Ruberg posted a condolence
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
I knew Ross from the Single Ski Club. He was always laughing and having a good time and brought smiles to everyone's faces. We shared a lot of fun both on and off the slopes, and, if we happened to pass a piano in our travels, well, that's where you'd find Ross. He was a multi-talented. great guy with a big heart and will be missed. My condolences to the Freed family on your loss.
...Don Ruberg
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Cathy Paul posted a condolence
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
I remember Ross so fondly from Temple Beth Emeth when we were in high school and am so sad to hear of his passing. I send heartfelt condolences to his loved ones.
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David Milstein posted a condolence
Tuesday, July 9, 2019
I grew up with Ross on Sage Hill in Menands. He was a sweet sole. He had such an upbeat outlook and was always so caring no matter what obstacles he faced . I remember after graduating from college and a difficult break up I came back to Menands and Ross comforted me. I only wish I could have done the same for him.
He was my first client when he asked to do a closing after I joined a law firm in Albany. I was a scared young bunny--but thought if Ross has confidence in me--I could do it.
RIP my friend.
David Milstein
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The family of Ross Freed uploaded a photo
Monday, July 8, 2019
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